I'm kicking myself for being pulled back into the relationship. It's not horrible and we are not fighting or anything, but I think I'm over it. I find myself liking the friend part of the relationship, but don't want to cuddle, or really to steam things up.
I have tried going thru the motions and you know... things physically work. But do I feel the spark anymore? No. I have really realized it this time but what do I do? I'm afraid to make any move for a couple of reasons. I don't want to hurt such a great guy and I'm afraid I will regret it.
But I have to remind myself that I made a huge change in my life when I came out to my wife. I did it under the belief that life is too short to be unhappy and not take chances... but here I am again.
I know it's almost Chirstmas and I'm not going to ruin it for him, but I have to really do some soul searching. I need to really make myself realize that I deserve to be completely happy and not just content, just for the sake of someone else. And I know he feels my lack of desire to be in it, but he's too afraid to open that box.
Please... if any of you readers have any advice... good or bad... please share it my way.
1 comment:
Dear newman, follow your heart and soul if the spark has gone. There will be more sparks soon and hopefully explode into eternal love and peace. I hope you, your son, him,family.friends had a great christmas season. All the best in the new year. a friend
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