Here is an email I received from the ex. The only things I have changed is I removed my son's name. The pain felt is obvious and apparently I will deal with stuff like this for many years to come as new triggers are brought to the surface....
I’m sending this to your hotmail account, because I don’t want to upset you at work. But at the same time after all that has gone on in this least 1.5 years, I think I have the right to get some things off my chest.
It KILLS me that you are camping this weekend with [our son] without me. That is something that we had always talked about doing as a family…and you ruined that. You have squashed a lot of my dreams and plans that even now, a year and a half later, new things come up and I’m just as hurt as I was in June 2008. I can’t say you ruined my life, because this would only ruin my life if I allowed that to happen…and I refuse to let that happen. What I am saying is that you took away the future I was looking forward to. The future that WE always dreamed of and the future I deserved to have. Now my future is unknown. I know it will be great, because [our son] and I will make it great, but it’s not what we had planned for 12 years.
I still think that you have NO idea what you have done to me, what I’ve been through and how I hurt. I think you need to know. I think the tears I’ve cried and continue to cry as we speak could fill the ocean. And that is NOT fair! It’s not what I deserved when I married you and we promised to be together forever. I still don’t know why you did it. When you said those words at the wedding did you not think that it was wrong considering all things? When you decided to pretend your way through that life, did you not think about what it could possibly do to the one you “loved” and your future children? I just now think that I was USED so you could TRY the “normal” life. You got the child that you always wanted... So I guess you got what you wanted and you’ll move on and have a life. Good for you.
You have no idea what you’ve put me through!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
It was hard for you to get that email, but even though I am a gay man, I can understand how upset she is. You did betray her. You were trying to 'test' whether you could be straight. She was the guinea pig. At least you had the guts to eventually come out rather than hide your entire life. But, you have to acknowledge her anger. Think how you would have felt if the tables were turned. She's just venting and that is part of the acceptance process of what happened. Don't blame her.
Post a Comment